I'm in a bit of a funk. Work is extremely busy and full of software applications that are just not behaving lately. I had a snafu with my AOL account, which I'm trying to shut down and I'm caught up in a bunch of red tape. Our cat, Sheila, is having some health issues that are worrying me. The holidays are coming up. Although I love the true meaning behind the season, the decorations, the parties, I dread the unrealistic expectations and the ancient family dramas that the holidays always provoke. I have to go to the dentist tomorrow.
Wah. Poor freakin' me. Generally, I can find it within myself to cope pretty well with the curveballs the universe puts in my path. But sometimes, I suck at it.
Right now I'm sucking.
I'm so fortunate to have a wonderful support system of friends and family who have been in constant contact with me to offer a hug or a beer, or in some cases, both. I have a gorgeous, patient and kind husband who is a pillar of strength and-- who knows why-- tolerates me even when I'm a beast. I live in the greatest city on earth and can go ice skating at lunchtime. I have a roof over my head and chocolate in my belly when I need it.
Despite all that wonderfulness, I found myself today spending way too much time focused on negativity. Bemoaning the few people in my life who disappoint me. Those who cannot accept your shortcomings but are always quick to point out what you do wrong or how you should be. The ones who are so wrapped up in their own self-importance that they can only see through the lens of what you can do for them. Wishing I could lose five pounds and that ginormous zit that's about to erupt on my chin. Or that I could run faster, have nicer hair, more money in my savings account.
Life is all about balance. Good and bad. I honestly have way more good than bad. And a day when I don't see that is, well, a day wasted.
This post is my attempt to refocus.
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